Andrew Sissons
| Sex | Male |
|---|---|
| Nationality | English |
| College | Christ Church |
| Club | Christ Church |
| Team | Christ Church 1st |
| Course | PPE |
| School | King's Chester |
| Matriculation year | 2005 |
Statistics
| Apps (sub) | Minutes | Bookings | Goals (pen) | ||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Last season | 11 (0) | 990 | 00 | 2 (0) |
Biography
Chester's finest, Andrew 'Andy' Sissons is the newly imposed spiritual leader of Christ Church AFC. Comparisons to to Glenn Hoddle don't stop there as he is also a racist (ask Bola).
Basing his whole game on the eternal mantra 'let the ball do the work', Andy prefers to sit deep (as it doesn't involve running) and shoot from deep (as it doesn't involve running). His subtle yet perenial possession of a smidgen of holiday weight is more than compensated for by his rapier of a left foot... and then cancelled out again by his complete lack of a right foot.
Although techincally a full back, a tactical switch to midfield enabled Andy's creative spark to be fully utilised on the pitch. A switch of responsibility to become the new girl's football coach also hopes to unlock Andy's spark with the ladies, although pre-season predictions are not so hopeful. However, when Sissons's incredible guile and flair are combined with his deft touch and a red hot eye for goal (particularly from the corner flag), one is left with quite possibly the best natural footballer ever to fill a pair of £10 Sports Soccer boots.
